Modern Love, Modern Struggles

Starting a new blog led me to brainstorm thousands of ideas and topics that I could address on, and that's when I began to struggle. Interacting with and observing my environment made me question whether young people truly understand the fundamental factors of a complete relationship. It is clear that in this current era, the mindset has drastically evolved from the past decade. Young people's interests are now influenced and dominated by multiple factors, such as instant communication through online platforms and cultural shifts that promote quicker, easier ways of interacting. While these advances facilitate the process of starting intimate relationships, they have also created a stigma, where a wrongful and misleading approach may impact an individual's commitment level.

That being said, I believe the uncertainty surrounding young people today means they may not fully understand how commitment works, which can lead to issues such as unfaithfulness. As a result, a "serial cheater" on the internet — someone who has multiple interactions with others — might struggle to differentiate between long-term happiness, which offers greater stability, and short-term happiness, which can have a negative impact. From my perspective, the current generation, which is in charge of society, faces a significant issue when it comes to reflecting deeply on their daily lives. Through this blog post, I would like to explore and emphasize the aspects of a proper relationship that many young people fail to comprehend.

To properly define the term ‘romantic relationship,’ one must engage in deep thinking, as it is a complex and sensitive matter that people often take lightly. Let’s dive into a deeper subtopic: the importance of developing stable emotional regulation skills and effective communication, not just with others but also with oneself. We live in a fast-paced world where communication evolves rapidly. In the past, people wrote and shared letters, but today, text messages, emojis, and stickers are often used — sometimes in misleading ways. As a result, young people struggle with handling their emotions during conversations. For example, when an argument arises in a relationship, the first instinct might be to react immediately or create a scene to address the issue. Behaviors like ghosting (disappearing without explanation) and passive-aggressive expressions are often seen as acceptable ways to deal with difficult situations, but these behaviors are not generally accepted in society.

From my recent conversations with many peers, I've learned that they wouldn't regret re-proposing their intimacy if given the chance to rewind. Despite acknowledging the end of their relationships, their answers sparked my curiosity and led me to a new perspective. One key takeaway is that there is no right or wrong in relationships — everything that happens is part of a bigger plan. Relationships are a lesson that requires both parties to be fully involved, understanding the consequences of their decisions. Moreover, we must be open to accepting the different energies expressed by our partners. This is similar to how, in discussions about mental health, people often seek positivity but forget that negativity is also essential for growth. Understanding the complexities of negative memories in a relationship, I’ve come to believe that the root of these memories lies in the conflict between two energies.

There is no such thing as perfect memories — it’s all about how an individual categorizes them. Another perspective that I believe is crucial is that negative memories in a relationship should not burden you or be used against you. Everyone should be open-minded and view them as learning opportunities. Even though we may not fully understand the role of negative experiences, one thing is certain: we learn from mistakes and try to avoid repeating them in the future. This applies to relationships as well. The way we discuss these things has broadened my perspective on how we should live, both in the world and in relationships. Many individuals choose to avoid challenges, but the best approach is to embrace these challenges, filter them, and develop a mindset that allows us to face them head-on.

By this point, you may be wondering how to identify a healthy relationship? Let’s now explore ways to sustain and cultivate a relationship in multiple ways. One key aspect is the ability to embrace vulnerability, which can heal a damaged heart. Unfortunately, many young people struggle to adopt this concept due to cultural beliefs and the way they were raised. This has created a sense of shame around vulnerability, where the fear of being judged or rejected becomes overwhelming. As a result, a psychological barrier is formed that can damage a relationship. Vulnerability doesn’t mean exposing yourself emotionally to everyone or oversharing with someone you just met. It is about seeking support from someone you trust, identifying and addressing misconceptions, and relieving emotional tension by sharing your thoughts with your partner. Fostering such deep interactions will help your relationship heal, grow, and mature.

Additionally, it is essential for young people to balance independence with togetherness. In a world that has evolved rapidly, personal autonomy has become a highly valued trait. There are many benefits to pursuing personal interests, such as traveling, building a career, or focusing on self-growth. However, an imbalance in these pursuits can lead to relationship issues. Young people may mistakenly believe that being independent means distancing themselves from emotional connections with their partners. A relationship doesn’t work that way; it requires both partners to put in equal effort and support each other in achieving a shared vision for the future. This involves allowing each other space to grow while maintaining mutual respect, maturity, patience, and compromise. In understanding one another, greater accomplishments can be achieved compared to trying to navigate challenges alone.

Another important lesson I’ve learned, and one that every young person should take to heart, is the importance of patience and a long-term perspective in relationships. The world we live in trains individuals to fight for what they want, but this has also cultivated impatience, especially in relationships. This impatience can cause harm, undermining positive things such as relationships, family, and friendships. The pace of society and culture has created an environment where those who long for true love may slowly lose hope. If an individual chooses impatience, the consequences can be severe, as it may lead to a diminished desire for meaningful relationships — a mindset that is taught by society and needs to be reconsidered.

In conclusion, a lasting and fulfilling relationship requires adaptability and thoughtful reflection. Every statement made in a relationship should be carefully considered, and problems should be solved one step at a time. At this point, it’s essential to focus on emotional maturity, as this will guide a relationship toward longevity. Love and intimacy are not just about finding someone to fulfill emotional needs; they are powerful tools that, if mishandled, can lead to unnecessary turmoil. Self-recognition and setting realistic goals are challenging, but it is crucial to prioritize your well-being above all else. Building a committed mindset requires courage and effort. If you’re not ready to take the next step, don’t start the journey. Communicate openly with your partner about your worries and excitement, just as you would with a close friend. Love won’t mess with your emotions; it’s a choice you make when the time is right.